What will I do differently?

I do not like feeling so.. unguided. I miss, I miss it so badly, being able to go to Trayu and tell him my problem, hear his advice and know what to do. I have to be honest that I have rarely had to make decisions for myself. I was.. complacent before. I always knew Trayu would know what was best, would tell me what I should do. Now I have a problem, I need to talk to someone and yet I have no idea who to turn too. I do not think I can go to Fonce with this one and I already know how most people feel about what's bothering me.

When I went to Fonce's Wagon this afternoon I found Seveya there. She was discussing what had happened last night and at first I was on her side, I knew how hard it was to be searching for your place, I knew what it was to be alone. Quickly though I began to feel rather irritated. Seveya.. was not being honest. She was being misleading. I was there for the whole thing and I knew perfectly well that the Artist was being a little difficult, she invited what she got. So to turn around and act like she was being picked on seemed unfair to me. Really unfair. I cannot help but feel that Seveya is demanding that others see her point of view while at the same time she refuses to see theirs. She shuts thier ideas down and places hers on top. And her ideas, her contributions, are actually valid but she shadows them by being the very thing she says everyone else is.. close minded.

I will not avoid her, though I'd like too, because I don't think that would be very fair either. I did not shout, or yell or say anything cruel to the artist, I only told her what I saw. As I left her though I could see it in her face.. she was offended. I think she likes to be offended.

I am growing rather terrified of when it will be my turn because in a lot of things I feel the same as Seveya, I did not disagree with most of the things she said last night.. only with how she said them and how she repeated them today. It is normal though to paint oneself in a better light to others though, isn't it? Can I really say I would not have done the same? In her shoes what, if anything, would I do differently?

What will I do differently?