"Tug, I need a favor."

I was so nervous waiting for Tug first this morning! I had sent Lei off to find out where Mezoo was and ask her a million questions about how old you had to be to grow a baby in your belly. And why did some slaves wear bells and some did not and why was the sky blue and the clouds white.

I did not expect to see them for a while.

When Tug arrived he seemed happy to see me, he had brought me a bowl of blackwine from the fire and I knew more then ever that he was Cana's son. Thoughtful of others to a fault. I thanked him and drank it even though it is not my favorite. He asked about the ropes he had been working on and I admitted I had not had time to touch them since I saw him last so he grabbed at the chance to work on it some more. I watched him with a grin, his need to be a man, and provide was more in his few years then I saw in many many twice my own age.

I let him work a bit while I got busy gathering the paints for this afternoon and I waited to bring out the memory until he had eaten a lunch.

"Tug.. I have something for you and I want you to listen very carefully to why I made it." Tug sat down beside me on the wagon steps, his eyes were curious as I began to talk... about Ba'ater. I told him how Ba'ater had asked me to make him a calendar of his birth fathers life and I told him how I had worked on that, how I had gone to people who knew him and asked about him. I shared the stories I had heard.. even the not so great ones so that when Tug stumbles along his way, he will know that he is not alone. His father will be smiling down on him from the skies. No one is perfect. I sang him the songs the singers keep about his father and I showed him what the calendar would have looked like.

If I had made it.

But I had not made him a calendar of his fathers life, I had not made him a story quilt either. Tug was growing confused as I finally unrolled the stiffened hide I had painted for him. His neck was red and so weren't my cheeks. I told him that I wanted him to understand how important this was, to me. That I had altered a task I was given to better fit..him. That I was willing to be scolded or even shunned for that. After I had met him though I knew a simple calendar would never be right.

I showed him the hide where I had painted all the colors and emotions that Tug made me feel when we spoke about his father. I painted what I saw on his face. I had painted strong hands and Canas laugh (Which is pink and white, like bubbles) I had painted a lance in those strong hands and I had painted younger hands, Tugs hands reaching out to take that lance form his father. The colors were soft, the colors of a fathers love, the colors a man is not always keen to accept.

Tug was silent as he looked at the hide, I placed it in his hands and I was silent as he looked it over. Several moments passed, people walked by, children giggled and played. Tug let it roll closed, I could see how hard he was trying to be strong. It was all I could do to not hug him.

He surprised me though and.. hugged me. I was caught off guard and laughed softly. I hoped Cana would be pleased with what I had done. I hugged him tightly in return and then looked at him seriously.

"I want to ask you for a favor too, Tug.. if you wouldn't mind. This is kind of a big favor."

"What is it Asria?" He asked. Just like Fonce would have I noticed.

"When my son is born he will not have a father.. " Tug nodded like he had already given this thought.

"Like me." He said.

I smiled softly. "Yes, like you, that's why I hoped that as my son grows you would.. befriend him. Be there when he wants to talk about it and I am sure he will want to talk about it and not so much with me. He will need a friend, someone he can trust. Could you do that for him?"

Tug grinned, a toothy boys grin. "I would be honored too."

Tug didn't say much else, a sincere thank you and he held that painting to his chest as he made his way back to his mother. I thought he might be eager to share it with her and to tell her about the favor.

I watched him go with almost as much pride as I would have had for my own children. When I looked at Tug I saw what my own soon would be like eventually, I hoped.

I saw hope.