Finding my Melody

"Aamon?" I spoke quietly as I neared the man I was directed too. I was wearing a pretty yellow skirt today, made of linen I had traded for at the Love Wars and a matching ribbon was threaded though my braid. My smile was timid.

He looked at me, his hands were damp with oil and studded with salt, he dunked them into a water barrel and then took my hands, both of them in his. "You are Asria, the confused Year Keeper who should be a singer." he told me and I blushed. He chuckled and released my hands. "My son told me to expect you today, come, we have much to discuss."

He seemed a little excited which in turn excited me. I was so fearful of this meeting! I was sure I would be scoffed at, berated. I said little, I felt shy and suddenly very young. A woman came into view as Aamon was washing up and she looked at me coldly.

"I have heard your daughter is a willful beast." She told me. So.. this was Ayg's mother? Charming. My smile slipped a little and I nodded to her.

"I have heard that nasty rumor myself. It is cruel, isn't it? How people will gossip about a little girl who lost her father?" I sighed for her, agreeing with her assessment of my little warrior princess.

Birmmah stared at me for a moment and then turned to snap something at Aamon who seemed to take it all in stride. Holy crow that woman was a demon. They spoke briefly, Birmmah casting me nasty looks now and then before Aamon kissed her cheek and beckoned to me to follow him. I hastened to keep up.

"Forgive me, I did not mean to upset your mate. I am so honored to meet the parents of Ba'ater and Ayguili." I spoke breathlessly as we walked, out though the herds, wandering though the animals as if we had no real destination.

"She is a good woman but under much strain with the absence of Ba'ater."

I only nodded, I understood loss. We walked in silence for awhile until we were far past the herds.. farther then I had ever been out before. I was.. nervous out here, undefended and with a man I did not know well. He was Ayguilis father though and well known to be one of the best in his clan. I was about to burst with questions when he finally stopped and..

"Take off your boots."

".....what?"

"Take off your boots, Asria who wishes to be of the singers."

I hesitated. How I wished I had someone’s hand to hold! I removed my boots and let my bare feet nestle in the soft grass. I was blushing hotly.

"Tell me what you can feel with your feet."

"My feet?"

He did not reply. I nodded and closed my eyes. I stood there for a moment, shifting slightly from side to side. Subtle swaying of my body as I directed everything to the things I felt in my feet.

"There is a tiny pebble under my left toe, it has a jagged edge that tickles the grooves of my skin. I have to keep lifting my toes to move it. The earth is cool today; I can feel it in tiny piles and aerated lines along my soles. It plays games with me, lures me with the promise of coolness if I sit down and dig my fingers into its depths. I can feel the life there, that grows the grass for the bosk.. I feel the Tuchuk under my feet. The grass touches me sweetly, like a woman would. Her fingers light and delicate upon my ankle, a pretty reminder that she is there.. waiting, always waiting, growing and feeding. I feel the tribe beneath my feet, I feel .. love."

Kings was I high? I paused and opened my eyes a little, squinting. I expected to find him laughing. Instead I found him.. smiling. I opened my eyes wider and smiled too. "It is not only grass."

"No, it is not only grass." he agreed.

We stood there quietly for a moment before he asked me about the sky, and the bosk. He asked me to tell him about my children and of Trayu. We spoke out there, among the new grass. Now and then outriders passed near us, keeping a watchful eye as we stretched the boundary of the Tuchuk, for Tuchuk land is anywhere a Tuchuk stands in my opinion.

It was nearing supper and I knew Mezoo would be anxious to return the baby and Lei would be worried. I did not want to upset his mate anymore either. We began to head back and I felt a growing disappointment. We had not spoken of singing! We had not spoken of clan at all. He had just asked me over and over again to tell him about things and people.

"Aamon.. Are you not going to ask me to sing for you?"

"You did sing for me." He replied with a knowing smile.

"What do you mean? I have not sung at all. What if I have no tune? What if I have no melody? What if.." I was charging off a cliff and he held up a hand to me. His palm faced up and he gestured to my own hand. I was so sad as I placed my hand over his.

"You sung for me today, and for the grass and the bosk and the sky. You sung of your family, your friends and your loves."

I was trying to understand.. but I had only spoken of those things.. in great detail, at great length. I had made him laugh and moved him once. I had touched his heart with the tales of my world.

"But I have no melody..." I whispered.

He folded his hand over mine and pressed my palm to my chest, over my heart.

"Yes, you do."

And realization dawned.