"Family, Mother"

All the biggest news in my life has come this way, though the drummers. I am often the last to know about decisions made on my behalf but, I must say, I have rarely been displeased. I have always been a lucky woman and surrounded by men and women who truly cared for my well being.

Lei and I were returning from a day long trek to the outer wagons. As we have been doing for more then a year now, we bring food and trinkets and slivers of happiness to the newly widowed. We bring stories and songs to the fatherless children and the occasional motherless. I had not done so in several hands, to my chagrin. I admit I was lost in my grief. I lost my son, I lost Trayu.. twice. It would be disrespectful to the memory of my loved ones to return to the land of the living too quickly.. My son deserved my mourning.

I was just beginning to enjoy the feel of sunshine on my skin again as we headed towards Orens wagons. I had not been to see her or Astar since the fire though I had received their gifts, food, well wishes and comfort.

That was when we heard the drummers announce the newest change in our lives.. the happiest one that I could ever remember.

First Fires.

And Fonce.

Lei and I stopped and looked at each other, my daughter smiled first, a slow easy grin that I had achingly missed. Tears welled up in my eyes and I dropped the woven basket I had been carrying to kneel down and hug her. She giggled in my ear and squeezed me much too hard. it was good though.. I think I might have cried harder if she hadn't. I had never felt so relieved.. I had worked for two years for this honor and had been so terribly close to letting go of the dream. it was a lesson. Never give up. I wouldn't again.

"First fires." I repeated as I let her go.

"Family, Mother." She replied with a smile.

And I knew, just knew, everything would be all right again.

Oren watched us from her step, a funny little half smile on her tight lips. I did not hesitate to go to her and hug her gently and, as always, she surprised me with the strength of her return embrace.

"Do not let him down, little singer." She told me, raspy words in my ear.

I only nodded into her shoulder. I had my rules and my precarious position in the world.. one I would never be terribly fond of but I would honor it. For Fonce. I'd be the angel of feminine perfection. I would keep my halo polished and my wings neatly tucked at my side. My toes will not slip again. I will never fail to be the Asria he expects me to be no matter how it makes me look to others.

Everything was going to be all right. I will never fall again.

ooc side note...
I just want to thank Fonce mun for being the best kind of friend anyone could ever hope to have. I do not get to be here much anymore and that is not likely to change soon. Fonce mun never makes me feel bad for it and always asks how I am with genuine interest. That's a rare and special thing. I have known him for many years and have never had a reason to doubt or distrust him. That too is rare and special in this sort of forum. He and the mun of Catch are two of the most honest and real people I have ever had the pleasure to know online and they have been there for me at the best and worst of times. I just wanted to thank you both and tell you that I love you.